When it comes to divorce or "long term relationships", there are some people who NEVER "get over it", even though everything happens for a reason and/or there were already warning signs.
They keep holding onto the past, never releasing the feelings, but holding them in, putting them onto other people and carrying them around every day.
Most of the feelings come from knowing it should have ended sooner and they were too stupid to stay in it.
Being stuck in the past, really means, being stuck in their anger.
Anger, because of the past, is deadly.
It brings on stress. Stress on them and stress on ALL THE PEOPLE AROUND THEM.
Displaced negativity and anger exudes from their entire body and makes people ugly - emotionally! And making themselves "pretty" in material ways will never hide the underlying repulsiveness they give off.
It also brings on their own "victimization" -- constantly talking about how they were wronged, when in reality it's probably the other way around. People listening to them constantly about their "victimization" probably already realize what a liar they are. The stress they feel being around them is exhausting!
Kids suffer the most. Having to go through the anger and incessant negativity of a parent, has a very traumatizing effect - even more so than a divorce/split.
Having to live with a dick/witch, is a horrible event in life!
And they eventually come to their own conclusions when they SEE the truth with their own eyes and they will forever label that parent as a liar.
Taking responsibility for their OWN crimes in their marriage/break-up, is the first step to recovering from their past and moving along.
They will never have healthy relationships when they're stuck in the past and their horrible whiny/angry/negativity/victim role.
No normal person wants to have any kind of relationship with an angry, negative victim.
Be Strong - Move Along!